Peer Edit: Jack S.

1. What are some areas that could use more detail? Why?
You could of possibly added more detail possibly describing what products weren't selling and why Feet Farm is no longer receiving business.


2. What additional sources might the author use? Does the lead involve you in the story?
Yes, the lead involves us as being the customers of the situation. You had a good amount of sources. Great Job Jack!!



3. Do the first 450 words contain a well defined scene (a detailed description of someone doing something or something happening)? What is it? If not, make a suggestion for a scene that might work.
Yes, it could be made a little bit more clearer but I could picture what would be happening in the scene you are describing. The employees standing around with not much to do just chillin.



4. What questions would you like answered in the next 300 words? What would you like to see or hear more of? Less of? Include, any other suggestions you have for improvement.
You could deffinetly explain and talk about if you're worried about getting fired and what your worries are about what could possibly happen to you.